Archive for December, 2008

The Weathermen’s Revenge

Ok, ok, ok, so the weathermen have gotten back at me for my snarky blog post yesterday by working their hoodoo magic and making it snow buckets. So many buckets, in fact, that I can no longer find Doc’s water bucket outside because it’s buried in so much snow.

Apparently, a convergence convention happened last night and now we’re all paying the price. It’s been snowing steadily all day and it’s safe to say that, unless there’s a sudden heat wave, Wes and I will be staying in for awhile.

If I were a guessing woman, I would say that so far there are about 5-6 inches of snow on the ground. Outside, I can hear children shrieking and laughing with delight, and it makes me smile to see their parents pulling them around on sleds. Everything I can see is covered in the nice snow, the kind that’s soft, powdery, and makes muffled crunching noises when you walk on it.

Doc has gone absolutely bonkers for the snow. I tried to snap some pictures of him but he was having too much fun to stand still for his mother. We went outside just a few minutes ago and Doc stepped one paw in the snow, watched it promptly disappear, and then went tearing off across the yard so fast he barely even left tracks.

He then stopped, stuck his whole head down in the snow like an exceptionally waggly ostrich, and then yanked it back up again, showering us both with the cold stuff. He looked so pleased with himself, face covered in snow notwithstanding, that I couldn’t help but laugh. He may be the most whimsically silly dog in the world. I have no idea what he was trying to accomplish but it would appear that he’s satisfied with his efforts.

I’m a bit sad about the timing of this whole thing, though. What with staying home from work yesterday because of the non-existent snow, and then staying home today and tomorrow, the last week before my holiday break is woefully short. I had so many projects that are now just going to have to wait until next year!

Oh well. At least Wes and I are both safe, the puppy’s well-behaved enough that he’s a pleasure to hang out with all day, and our house is warm and cozy. We currently own no vehicles that are wrapped around trees, and neither of us is stuck sleeping at work because we can’t get home. All in all, it would appear that there’s not much to complain about.

The only cause for concern is running out of food. At some point this weekend I’m going to have to go grocery shopping. When that time comes, I suppose I can just rig up a sled and have Doc pull me to Safeway. He may have a bum leg, but the dog can cut through snow like nobody’s business.

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A Speck of Nonsense

Sometimes, the things I come across while working astound me. Like this sentence:

“Meanwhile, the tap water containing tadpoles can be used to improve the health of your mother in law.” Source

Of course it’s taken out of context, but still, sometimes when a headline jumps out at you, you have to stop and take notice. The more you know, you know?

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Weathermen Are Not Scientists

This morning I awoke with great trepidation. In the midst of already-freezing temperatures, alarming new words were being bandied about by sharply-dressed men wearing ties and pointing at maps. Words like “snow storm” and “severe weather warning” and “2-5 inches of snow.”

After consulting two separate weather predicting sites on the Internet, I made a reasonably educated decision to stay home from work. After all, the weathermen were all busy predicting ice and snow for the entire state, who was I to assume they would all be wrong?

Now, here I sit at 2 in the afternoon. I’m looking outside and all the snow that was lying on the ground this morning has melted away to nothing. It’s cloudy, but not with the kind of clouds that dump down snow. It’s windy, but the last time I checked, “windy conditions” did not equate with “hazardous snow conditions”.

The weathermen have all changed their tunes since the wee hours of the morning. Now they’re saying that things will turn wintry later tonight. This is all well and fine for them, but I stayed home from work today for absolutely no reason whatsoever and I’m feeling a mite tiffed about the whole affair.

I feel like so silly staying home when the roads couldn’t be any clearer, and the driving conditions couldn’t be safer. I’ve done as much work from home as I can, but now I’m all done and I have the whole afternoon left during which to stew about how annoyed I am by the erroneous weathermen and their make-believe snow storm.

As such, I have decided that weathermen no longer deserve to be called scientists. As we all know, scientists are always right. This classification no longer applies to mischievous weathermen so, even though their fancy titles are “meteorologists”, they no longer have the privelege of being called scientists.

Charlatans? Sure! Impeccably-dressed men and women who point at maps and sound like they know things? Terrific! But scientists? No. Not now. Not ever. Never.

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A Very Dapper Dog

This post will have to be kept short, because alas it is late, I am sleepy, and no one ever said in so many words that a blog post absolutely had to be 600+ words. The reason I’m so sleepy and blogging so late is that Wes and I just got home from celebrating our third anniversary with dinner at the Cheesecake Factory! See? The evidence is up there on the left *point point*

If this cheesecake weren’t perishable, and I were still single, it would run a serious race against Wes for my affections. I was about four forkfuls shy of taking this bad-boy home to meet my parents. It’s the Adam’s peanut butter ripple blah-blah-forty-word-long-name cheesecake and it was everything I was hoping it would be.

The frosting was peanut butter, it was packed full to bursting with all kinds of interesting tastes and textures. Unfortunately, I was so full from dinner that I only made it through about five bites before I had to throw in the napkin and request a box. You know food is either supremely excellent or hilariously awful, though, when I’m compelled to photograph it so I have proof that it existed before going straight to my bowl full of jelly.

The cold here has yet to abate, so Doc continues to spend an inordinate amount of time scrunched up in his crate. He managed to scoot it halfway across the room today (he was nearly to the other end of the room, which contains a bookcase, so I’m assuming he was scooting toward some new reading material) and I could swear he’s taking correspondance courses whilst encased in his plastic palace.

The reason you see my big, tough, 85lb. dog wearing a cheery red scarf is that, when I came home wearing said scarf, Doc went bananas and tried to eat it (he gets very excited when he discovers new things he can fit into his mouth). For some reason, this seemed to me to be a good reason to make him wear it and hence we have this picture. Two treats and one command later, we have an adorable picture of my dog wearing a scarf. You tell me: Was it worth it?

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A Week Great in Magnitude

This is a big week, ladies and gents, a BIG WEEK. Not only did we have our first snowfall on Saturday, we’re in the middle of the most severe cold-snap this region has seen for many years.

The temperature is plummeting to the teens on a much-too-regular basis and it’s so cold outside that your windshield washer fluid will freeze the minute it hits your windshield (not that any California-native ditz would know that from personal, dim-witted experience, of course…) It’s too cold for the puppy to stay outside during the day so he’s been hanging out in his crate a lot. If you ask us, we’re protecting him from frostbite. If you ask him, we’re being cruel animal-haters who probably eat babies.

You can choose who you would like to believe.

Anyway, aside from all the (bone-chilling, extremity-numbing, hyphen-requiring) cold we’re enduring, this week happens to be the week of our third wedding anniversary. Three years ago, Wes was living in an empty house and waiting for his fiancee to finish moving her crap over from her apartment, I was finishing up Finals Week and trying very hard not to succumb to the madness that is brought about by buying a house, finishing Finals, and getting married in a two-month span. We were mere days from promising to stick together like super-glued lobsters and couldn’t have been more excited.

Now, we’re mere days away from our third anniversary, we are more weird and ridiculous than we ever were while dating, and we couldn’t be more excited about stuffing our faces. Unless we’re snowed in, we’ll be heading to the inimitable Cheesecake Factory for our anniversary dinner (hooray gift cards!!) and spending hours there imbibing and eating until we’re so fat we have to roll home. I do love a good roll home!

In other news, Wes and I have decided that holiday gift-exchange parties = awesome because last week we brought a cookbook I’ll never use (too many fancy ingredients) and took home a bottle of wine and a sparkly Christmas decoration. Wins all around!

Today also happens to be the very first day I worked full time at Bottle Your Brand, so of course now it’s later than I thought it would be, my music is so fast-paced that I’m typing without thinking (Wes gave me a Rise Against CD for Christmas and it’s rocking my socks off in a frenetic manner), and I have to go make dinner before it’s so late that it’s technically considered breakfast.

Whether because of snowstorms, frigid temperatures threatening to turn our dog into a pupsicle, or our third anniversary, this is going to be a great week. What are you looking forward to this week?

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