Archive for the ‘ Food ’ Category

Looking My Dinner in the Face

I learned something new today. An opportunity presented itself to learn about something I’ve always been curious about, and I seized it. And yes, it does have something to do with chickens.

Jody and Griffin, some friends of ours,are getting into the chicken raising business, with the intention of selling the eggs and meat. Curious about the process, I asked if I could be a part of it. They said yes, they were butchering some chickens on Wednesday, would I be interested in participating?

I said yes, and that’s how I found myself hanging out at a chicken farm this morning.

When I showed up at the farm, I got the grand tour and what I saw was happy chickens. They had lovely enclosures with plenty of room to walk around and spread their wings. They had large, green pastures to peck around in. These were happy birds.

Cindy, the woman who owns the farm, clearly had an emotional attachment to the birds. She told me she’d talked to the condemned birds the previous night, letting them know it was their time to go. And when it was their time to go? It was done with dignity. I suppose there’s no painless way to kill a chicken, but if there’s anything close, it’s the way they did it.

Even though I observed, I couldn’t quite work up the nerve to do the deed myself. I did, however, help pluck and dress the chickens afterward. I learned a lot about anatomy, and feel confident I could prepare a chicken for dinner should the occasion ever arise for me to kill my own dinner.

I’m still processing the experience. I don’t think a normal person can watch something die without feeling that as a spiritual impact of some kind.

For now, though, I can say one thing with certainty: I’m having serious second thoughts about buying our meat from grocery stores. After watching the happy chickens and knowing what their lives were like before they were killed, I’m not sure I want to eat chickens from commercial vendors.

There’s just something very meaningful about looking your dinner in the face. I know, you’d think it would be weird. But it wasn’t. It was really neat to know exactly what the chickens ate, where they lived, and how they were handled. I think of all the food documentaries out there shedding light on the meat industry and think maybe I’d be better off without watching them.

Because I know what I saw, and I know what I felt. It felt…respectful. My friend prayed over the chicken before slitting their throats, and that felt right. When I eat those chickens, I’ll know they were grass-fed, free range birds, and that feels right. I don’t need to know the particulars of the mis-treatment of those animals to know that this is a better alternative. When it’s right, you know.

I don’t know if I’ll ever need to use the information I learned, but I don’t think that was the important part of today. I think the important part was me coming to terms with where my meat comes from. Today was an interesting day, and while I’m certain I haven’t found the bottom of this particular barrel of emotions, I’m confident I’ll like what I find there.

(PS: If you’re local to Seattle and want to get down with local farmers who raise happy chickens, check out Wholesome Eats Pastured Poultry!)

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The Quest for Skinny Erika Week 10

I have to start this week’s quest update with a story. A story about temptation.

I have been assaulted by cupcakes in the past few days. Literally assaulted. Like, every freaking where I go, there’s a luscious cupcake staring me smack in the face, smelling its yummy smells and luring me into perdition with creamy frosting. I blame birthdays. We celebrated a couple in the family over the weekend, with the last birthday getting celebrated on Monday night.

Tuesday afternoon was my personal training session so I climbed into my car, eager to put Cupcake Alley behind me to head for Greener Salad Pastures. And what should I find in my car?

A cupcake.

Wes took one on Monday night with the intention of eating it later, and then forgot it in my car. It had sat there all night, filling my car with the transcendent smell of chocolate, peanut butter, and TEMPTATION.

I sat there staring at it, like it was a rattlesnake that might bite me. Moving slowly, I reached for it, careful not to move too quickly lest it cram itself in my mouth. Carrying it into the house, I set it on the counter and then turned, my hands shaking with the exertion of being so close to peanut butter buttercream and not eating it.

I managed to make it to my personal training session without further incident, but it was a near thing.

And that just about sums up this week in weight loss. It turns out that cupcakes are still fan-frigging-tastic even after you’ve lost 27 lbs.

But, I have lost 27 lbs., which means I lost weight this week, which means I had only a brief interlude with the no good very bad weight loss plateau. Huzzah! For details on what I did to defeat the horrible weight loss plateau, check out my blog post for Fitness Together Sammamish for this week!

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Requiem for a Feast

I almost mugged a kid for his Auntie Anne’s pretzel yesterday. I took Aidan to the mall so he could run around the kids’ play area, and while we were perambulating around some impudent teenage boy was foolish enough to walk past me eating a soft, chewy, sweet, cinnamon-sugar pretzel.

As the predatory waves infiltrated my brain through my nostrils, I felt a Hulk-like anger and rage flow through me. Were it not for the stroller weighing me down, I might very well have vaulted over the planter and taken him, and his pretzel, down.

Oh, I am sick of dieting. Heartily sick to my core of healthy food and reasonable portions. Reasonable is code for “rarely full.”

Yeah, there will be no more breakfasts like this for me.

I miss the days when I would sit down on a Friday night with half a pizza, a martini, and chocolate chip cookies for dessert. I remember with GREAT fondness the last 25 years of my life wherein I was blissfully unaware of how many calories I consumed each day. Yeah, my body wasn’t skinny but I didn’t really care because I had cupcakes.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I’m skinnier now and my pants fit much better. But do better-fitting pants buy happiness the same way a stack of French toast and a piping hot mocha do? Absolutely not. I won’t get belly-patting contentment and bliss from eating my smaller pants.

I blame my knee for this outburst. My left knee, the resident slacker knee, is injured. Again. I injured it during middle school and it’s never been able to get over it. I suppose middle school really does irrevocably damage you, one way or another.

This is my life now.

In trying to overcome the weight loss plateau, I decided to increase the intensity of my workouts by incorporating some brief sprints while jogging on the treadmill. My left knee said thanks, but no thanks, and now I’ve got a sore left knee and I’m still not losing weight and all I want is to stuff my face without consequences and GRRRRRR!

So you see? Losing weight isn’t all sunshine and kittens. Not around here. Around here, you get a fair representation of the intricate psychological workings of a former glutton mourning her loss of gastronomical freedom.

Really, I’m sure Darren Aronofsky could do a riveting documentary of my mind’s inner workings and need very few special effects to make it absolutely terrifying.

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Just a Little Dab’ll Do Ya

Just in case I haven’t reiterated myself a gajillion times already, I’m trying to lose weight. I’m watching what I eat, exercising, and staying the heck away from bakeries.

Wes knows this. And he’s supportive. Well, most of the time, at least. He went to Costco the other day for healthy lunch options and came back with…Mozzarella Sticks. And chicken alfredo.

Nevetheless, regardless of the force required for old habits to die, he is supportive and encouraging and it’s really very helpful. He asked me what I wanted to do for Valentine’s Day and I replied nothing, because newly calorie cognizant Erika is terrified of Valentine’s Day. There are chocolate covered sea salt caramels on Valentine’s Day. And wine. And food. None of those things are congruent with my desire to be less lumpalicious.

Wes disregarded my desire to do nothing for Valentine’s Day (you cannot suppress a man so fantastic) and came home with a prime rib roast, flowers, chocolate, chocolate wine (oh yes, it does exist), and a baguette of French bread.

I took one look at the stuff in his arms and ran straight to the gym. I had thirty minutes in which to exercise and I worked up an impressively pink face in the time allotted to me.

When I got home, I decided I would enjoy everything he brought home. In moderation.

This is a new concept for me, this moderation business. If one chocolate chip is good, one whole bag will be, like, five hundred times as good!

But lo, I had a husband who wanted to spoil me so I tried just a smidge of everything. I sampled some of the chocolate wine, I nibbled the prime rib roast, and had just a little of the dessert he made.

All in all, I ate exactly enough to meet my calorie goal for yesterday AND got to enjoy chocolate and wine and deliciousness.

This is a watershed moment, you guys. Knowing that watching my weight does not equate to a miserable hermit-like existence wherein cottage cheese and almonds are my only friends is life-changing. And I was pleasantly surprised to find that I was perfectly content with just a few sips of the chocolate wine and just a few nibbles of chocolate.

All in all, it was an excellent Valentine’s Day in virtually every way possible. I hope yours was good as well!

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Ouch

The problem with waking up early to go to the gym is that the whole day suddenly seems longer.  You wake up and schlep out the door half-awake.  You get to the gym, which is loud and bright and filled with perky people.  You wake up when your heart starts crying for mercy as you do cardio on the elliptical, and by the end of your workout you’re wide awake and you come home to find everyone else in your family is still sound asleep.

By the time they wake up, you’ve been up for hours and suddenly your day is split into two parts, and by the time you get to the evening you feel like the morning was actually yesterday and you’re exhausted but you don’t know why because you worked out yesterday not today and…Oh, wait, this morning was today.  Weird.

I have worked out for at least 25 minutes every day for three days in a row.  I know this may not seem like much to people who exercise regularly, but it’s a lot for me.  I’m sore.  Very sore.  So sore, in fact, that I had trouble sleeping last night because I felt like I had a toothache in my legs.

To be honest, I really dislike feeling sore.  Some people like it.  From what I hear, some people love feeling that burn that lets them know they committed fitness.  For me, though, it makes me sad.

I like feeling good.  I love being warm and snuggly, with a full belly and plenty of sleep and maybe a soft blanket to cuddle under (wow, Aidan and I have a lot in common).

This whole soreness business is the opposite of what I like.  I know it’s good, and I’m thankful I have the opportunity and means to attain my goal of losing weight, but if I’m being honest I have to say I really don’t enjoy the process much.

Maybe if I’d been more sporty as a kid, I’d feel differently.  I was one heck of a reader and had an incredible vocabulary, but was painfully awkward and far more comfortable lifting books than balls.

Wes assures me it will get better, that the more I workout the more my body will become accustomed to the abuse.  I sure hope so.  Because I can say with certainty that cupcakes never made me sore (and yes, I know cupcakes make you fat and that makes your knees sore, but I like to think the cupcakes aren’t the problem, it’s the meat and veggies I eat in addition to the cupcakes that are making me fat).

*sigh* There’s really no hope for me, is there?  I have the sneaking suspicion that it’s exactly this kind of self-deluding nonsense that got me into this mess in the first place.

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