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WTF, WF?
Tuesday, August 10th, 2010 | Author: Erika

I’ve mentioned it on here perhaps a dozen times, but only in passing so I wouldn’t be surprised if longtime readers don’t remember.  Don’t remember what, you ask?  Why, that Wes and I have been trying to get our mortgage modified for the better part of two years, that’s what.

A long, long time ago, I can still remember how the thought of a modified mortgage used to make me smile…

A couple years ago, our job situation got all shaken up and our income was seriously reduced.  This was a problem, because we were one of the hapless millions who bought homes they, strictly speaking, couldn’t really afford.  Our mortgage gobbed up as much as 60% of our income at times, and sensible lending practices dictate that your mortgage should account for no more than 30% of your income.

Still, we made the payments.  We scrimped, never went on dates (seriously, there was one year when we went on two dates.  Total.  Both of which were paid for by gift certificates) and kept our house so frigid that we wore three layers of clothing and huddled under blankets during the winter.  We considered living la vida poverty worthwhile because we had a house.  A house, we were assured, was the best investment you could make.

Until it wasn’t.  It turns out we bought our house at the apex of the housing market, and when the housing prices began self-correcting, we were dismayed to find that our house was worth far less than we had paid for it.  So now we had an income-gobbling mortgage on a house we had no hope of selling.

All this would have been fine, except for the issue of the house itself.  This house is a fine starter house, and is perfectly sufficient for two adults and a baby.  There is, however, no room for a second baby.  There wouldn’t even be room for a dog, and a baby.  We have a little over 1000 square feet, a washer and dryer that live in the garage (where they freeze and become useless in the winter), and no pantry.  There is really no way we can stay here indefinitely.

So, we pursued a mortgage modification.  Supposedly our bank, Wells Fargo, would be motivated to modify our mortgage rather than risk us foreclosing on our house.  Well, they’re either too stupid to put those pieces together or unfazed by the idea of a foreclosure, because it’s taken us two years to get a modification proposal from them.

We received the proposal yesterday.  I opened the envelope with incredulity, which quickly turned to dismay when I realize what they were proposing.  Their proposal was to turn our 5 Year ARM into a 30 Year Fixed mortgage…And increase our monthly payments by a little over $500 per month.

Wells Fargo mortgage modification specialist.

Wells Fargo mortgage modification specialist.

That’s right.  Increase.

All I can say to that is, WTF, WF?  I mean, in what kind of perpetual opposite-day must they be living to think that, if we’re having trouble with our current mortgage payment, increasing it by $500 per month is going to help?

I mean, even if all things remain equal, our interest rate will change when our ARM is up in a year so we’re still screwed.  Now we have some serious negotiating to do with our (pigheaded, idiotic, dumb dumb dumb) bank.  If they’re unwilling to offer something that’s even vaguely realistic, we’re facing some big decisions.

Lucky for me, I have the perfect antidote to big decisions: baby cuddles.  Aidan’s in this really great phase where he falls asleep while eating, thereby enabling me to cuddle his sweetly sleeping self for as long as I want.  Yeah, I forsee a great many cuddles in the near future.

Category: Lifestyle, Opinionated much?  | 8 Comments
A Day In the Life of a Stay at Home Mom
Monday, May 24th, 2010 | Author: Erika

Have you ever had one of those days where you worked your tail off and ran around like a crazy person all day, and then when someone asked you what you did that day it all came out sounding like not very much at all?  I kind of feel like that’s every day of being a stay at home mom.

I mean, a typical day looks a lot like this:

  • Baby wakes me up via talking sounds over the monitor.  Walk into nursery to find Aidan smiling and talking to the flying koopa above his crib.
  • Change baby, get dressed, make bed, make breakfast, then feed baby while eating breakfast.  Wipe crumbs off his head.
  • Play with baby for about an hour.  This entails tummy time, reading books, going for walks, staring at the ceiling, running errands, cleaning the house, laundry, etc.
  • First nap time, which can and will only ever happen in my arms.  I spend this hour holding the baby with one hand, reading and not commenting on blogs with my other hand (I hate one-handed typing!).
  • Baby wakes up, change baby, feed baby, play time!
  • Second nap, which can and will only ever happen in his swing.  During this hour I clock into work for what I hope will be a solid uninterrupted hour of working time.  This rarely happens, but I still hope for it every day.
  • Change and feed awake baby, make dinner, welcome husband home, eatdinnerwatchTVfeedbabyputbabytobedshowerbedtimeforme (evenings always go by in a blur).

So, obviously I don’t do nothing.  Why, then, do I never have a response when people ask me what I do all day?  I guess I could say, “I kept a tiny human alive and ran my household like a rock star” but that would probably only result in even more strange looks from those who are silly enough to ask me that question.

Clearly the only people who would ask a stay at home what she does all day are people who have never had babies…

Category: Lifestyle  | Tags:  | 5 Comments
Weekend Win!
Monday, May 10th, 2010 | Author: Erika
Aidan at the farmer's market. Of course, Aidan was far more interested in his tasty knuckles than in the fresh local produce.

Aidan at the farmer's market. Of course, Aidan was far more interested in his tasty knuckles than in the fresh local produce.

Can I just say that my husband is awesome?  I can, can’t I?  Because if I can’t, then why the heck am I paying to host this blog?  Down with censorship!

Jeeze, easily distracted much?

All distractedness aside, Wes is awesome.  We spent some seriously fun time together as a family this weekend and it was bliss.  On Friday we decided to celebrate Cinco de Mayo in honor of my late father.

My Dad loved Cinco de Mayo (he was a phenomenal cook, and his favorite kind of food to make was Mexican food) and he also loved The Big Lebowski (he loved that movie so much that at his request we carried his ashes around in a coffee can until we could spread them in the ocean), so we whipped up some White Russians and tamales and had a fan-freaking-tastic evening.

Yes, I cried at the end of the movie, and cried even more when we watched the slideshow of his life my aunts made for his memorial.  But, I don’t think it’s a bad thing to cry because you miss someone you love.  It felt nice to spend an evening enjoying the things he enjoyed, and I’m really glad Wes was willing to share it with me.

On Saturday we took Aidan to the local farmer’s market for the first time.  I don’t know what the farmer’s markets are like in your area, but ours is pretty fantastic.  Lots of fun, food, and festivity.

We bought some fresh asparagus, potatoes, and English toffee, and then stopped by Costco to buy some crab-stuffed salmon.  Wes then proceeded to make me a special Mother’s Day dinner the likes of which has not been seen this side of a 5-star restaurant.  De-LISH!

Of course Sunday was Mother’s Day, and it was a lovely time.  Wes gave me an incredibly thoughtful gift and I’d be remiss if I didn’t tell you what it is: A silver ring with an amethyst (Aidan’s birthstone).  I wear it on my right ring finger and it looks perfect there.  Such a thoughtful gift!  Now I have a ring to celebrate the day I became a wife (my wedding ring) and a ring for the day I became a mother.

Now it’s Monday.  And I’m kinda sad.  It was such a fun weekend, why did it have to go and end?

Category: Cancer sucks, Lifestyle  | 2 Comments
The Deal with the Cloth Diapers Part Two
Tuesday, April 27th, 2010 | Author: Erika

I honestly didn’t think there was going to be a part two to this post, but that’s parenting.  Wes and I had such good intentions with the cloth diapers.  We researched, prepared, and assured one another that it was totally worth the monetary savings to just have to do a little more laundry.

Then came the reality of being parents to an infant.

We started Aidan off with disposable diapers, so that I could have a chance to get my feet under me without heaping anything more onto my plate.  When we did try the cloth diapers, we were appalled to discover that they leaked like nobody’s business.  I was doing four times as much laundry thanks to the diapers and extra outfits!

So, I turned to Twitter, and my cloth diapering friends there.  They recommended Snappis, the cloth diaper fasteners, to help the cloth diapers fit a bit more snug and prevent leaks.  Wes and I bought some, tried them, and were very pleased with the results.

We had the cloth diapers, the cloth diaper covers, the cloth diaper fasteners, and…no will whatsoever to use them.  Wes was still willing to give the whole thing a go, but I so was not.  Cloth diapering was never really my idea (Wes originally proposed it) but I was willing to give it a shot, especially since Wes still didn’t have a job when we bought said diapers.

It took me twice as long to change Aidan with the cloth diapers, I had to change him a lot more often, and the smell of the dirty cloth diapers bothered me even though they were in a trash can with a tight-sealing lid.  All in all, I just wasn’t feeling it and, since I change 90% of Aidan’s diapers, Wes conceded to defeat.

Besides, we’ve found that we don’t spend nearly as much on disposable diapers as we thought we would.  Add that to the fact that the cloth diapers would only have fit until Aidan was six months old or so, and he was too small to wear them until he was two months old, and the cloth diapers really weren’t saving us that much money anyway.

So that’s the deal with the cloth diapers.  Part two.  They just didn’t work out for us.  I’ll never be one of those hip blogging moms who waxes poetic about her cloth diapers.

If there’s a new hole in the ozone over Washington state, we can name it after Aidan’s bottom, ok?

Category: Aidan, Lifestyle  | Tags:  | 8 Comments
The Deal with the Cloth Diapers
Monday, February 01st, 2010 | Author: Erika

I posted on Facebook this weekend that I’d just bought a whole bunch of cloth diapers, and the response was mostly positive.  There were, however, a few people who told me I was nuts, and yet more people who assured me that disposable diapers are way better than cloth diapers.

I just thought I’d share a bit about why Wes and I have chosen to go with cloth diapers for Squishy’s little buns, because I’d rather that people didn’t get the wrong idea about me.  The following are myths:

  • I love doing laundry, and thus have chosen cloth diapers because I just can’t get enough of washing and folding stuff all day every day.
  • I like poop.
  • I would rather do more work in an effort to save the environment, because I am self-sacrificing and magnanimous and hug squirrels when I get the chance.

What, then, if not a love for poop and squirrels and laundry, is the reason we decided to go with cloth diapers?

Cost.

We sat down and did the math, reformulating our monthly budget to account for the increased costs associated with having a child, and realized that our little family has the best chance of making it if we use cloth diapers.  We estimated that we’d spend about $60-$80 a month on disposables, which, while not horrible, is still a number that must be contended with.

We just bought $220 in cloth diapers, which should get us through Squishy’s first nine months of life.  This means we spent less than half as much on diapers for Squishy’s first nine months, and we can reuse the diapers when Squishy’s siblings arrive.

Now, I realize that there are people in the world for whom extra laundry and close proximity to poop are not worth the savings.  Wes and I are simply willing to make the sacrifice to keep our budget as lean as possible.

The diapers are actually really easy to use (no pins or anything) and we think Squishy will be very content with his big fluffy bum-cushion.  Our plan for now is to use disposable diapers (which several people generously gifted us with) for Squishy’s first couple weeks while I’m getting the hang of being a mommy, and then make the switch.

So that’s the deal with the cloth diapers.  Anyone out there using or used cloth diapers?  How’d it work out for you?  Any tips?

Category: Aidan Pregnancy, Lifestyle  | Tags:  | 13 Comments
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