Wes and I, with Aidan in tow, decided on a spontaneous dinner at a local Mexican restaurant last night.  Sometimes you just need some shredded beef, y’know?

We sat down, I handed Aidan a paper napkin to destroy, and we commenced sharing tortilla chips and tales of the day.  About five minutes into our relaxing, quiet dinner, we heard a gaggle of what sounded like teenage girls descend on the maître d’.  A minute later, they were seated in the booth right next to us.

At first, they were just loud.  They harassed the waiter with intentionally poorly spoken Spanish (I refuse to believe anyone could butcher a language that badly except on purpose) and spoke loudly and with great affinity for profanity.  Had Aidan been at a speaking age, I would have asked them to watch their language.

Then, they started throwing ice cubes into the aisle of the restaurant, cackling like hyenas all the while.  They continued to harangue the waiter and busboy, and the waiter adopted a look of exasperated resignation while dealing with them.

Wes and I tried conversing while we tucked into our food, but the uproar coming from the booth next to us was such that it rendered our conversation useless.  Especially when they started wrestling or something and crashing into the back of the booth hard enough to move it.  Wes, whose back was against the back of the booth in question, was not amused.

Still they got louder.  They were drunk on their own 8th grade fabulousness, and convinced that the world was likewise intoxicated by what I’m sure they thought was their hilarious behavior.  Finally, disgusted, Wes and I paid for our food and got up to leave.  As we were leaving, they got louder still.

My patience for things like this is not great.  I was raised with a strict expectation of civilized behavior in public, and watching these girls ruin both my meal and the meals of those around me vexed me past the point of quiescence.

As they shouted at each other and then dissolved into obnoxious laughter, I said, firmly, “Seriously you guys: SHUT UP.”

Wes, knowing my temper, scuttled out the door with Aidan.  I walked over to their table, where I saw four 8th grade girls wearing embarrassed looks (I know they were in 8th grade because I heard them discussing it).  I followed up by saying, “Honestly?  I’ve seen 5 year olds who were better behaved in restaurants than you are.”  Then I left.

There was so much more I wanted to say.  I wanted to tell them that wearing shorts that are so short that your butt cheeks hang out the bottom is really just an invitation for skeevy middle-aged men to stare at your jail-bait-backside.  I wanted to tell them that fake-baking yourself orange doesn’t make you look thin, it makes you look blind.  I wanted to tell them that their behavior was immature, and likely the reason they were all still single.

But I didn’t.  I left.

Wes contends that what I said was a very mom thing to say, like telling them I was so disappointed in them.  I don’t know if it was a mom thing to do, I’m fairly certain I would have said that pre-baby.  But still, something had to be said.  Or did it?  Would you have made the same call?

I was chatting with my sister in law last night about first babies.  Specifically, the way having a baby can really mess with your head those first few days.  I’ve made no secret of the fact that I struggled during Aidan’s first days.  I loved him, and I felt very loved and taken care of, but the drastic change in my life and routine sent my head spinning.

As our new routine emerged, I eased into my new life.  It looked nothing like my pre-baby life, but it was no less fulfilling for being different.  Every day helps me feel a little more like I’ve got a handle on my new life as a mother, and I can’t even tell you how good that feels.  Aidan and I have a lot of fun together, and even though I’m not perfect I know my little guy is healthy, happy, and learning.  Good enough, in my opinion.

What I haven’t gotten a handle on yet is being a wife too.  Before Aidan was born, I feel like I was a pretty good wife.  Wes and I devoted a lot of time to each other and to our marriage.  It’s very easy to give a ton of attention to your spouse when there’s no adorable little baby to steal the show.

It’s been almost six weeks since Aidan joined our world, and Wes and I still have yet to go on a date.  We are terrific parents to our baby, and we help one another as much as possible, but we’ve definitely gotten out of practice paying attention to one another.  So, we’re going on a date!  A real date, with just the two of us, where we make eye contact and get to eat at the same time without one of us holding the baby.

According to Wes, we’re going to go on a quest for the best burger in Seattle.  Sounds like fun, no?  Is it weird, then, that I feel anxious?  I’ll be expected to converse with my husband, and I have nothing to talk about except Aidan.  I am the most boring person on the planet, how am I possibly going to make sparkling conversation with my husband?

Maybe the first post-baby date is supposed to be a little rough?  Maybe everyone gets out of practice being spouses when they’re getting used to being new parents?  I don’t know.  What I do know is I could use some good conversation topics for my first post-baby date with my husband.  Any of you have any good topics of conversation?  Any cool tidbits you’ve learned?  Random facts?  Gossip or news items?  Help!