The New Vigilantes Are the Ones With Water Bottles

I just came across an article that details a new law that will ban the city of Seattle from buying bottled water. This article views the measure as a positive first step toward world water bottle banishment.

Under this new law, the city of Seattle is no longer allowed to purchase bottled water. This means that when you go to official city functions (and I know you all do), you will not see bottled water there.

This forces me to wonder how the city plans to hydrate its guests. Will they provide paper cups and direct attendees to the sinks in the bathroom? How about handing out DIY urine-to-drinking-water converter kits? Perhaps they will start requiring that each person brings their own glass as well so as to cut down on paper cup waste.

I have to admit, the ramifications (in my mind) of this measure are pretty grim.

This leads me to wonder, though, that here in the most highly-taxed state in the nation, our biggest concern is water bottle usage? Give me a break! Why don’t we direct the mayor to more pressing matters (such as the exorbitant taxes we pay each year that eat up entirely too much of our paychecks or the deplorable state of our public teachers’ wages) and when those are fixed he’s free to pursue his other interests at his leisure.

This whole thing just reeks of Big Brother to me. First, they take away our water bottles. Next, we’re all required to carry our state-provided Nalgene bottles (with a fine, of course, if you’re caught without yours). The next thing you know, you’re sharing a prison cell with a rapist because you had the temerity to try to sneak a swig from a water bottle in a movie theatre and the nark in front of you blew the whistle.

Is it just me, here? Do you agree with banning water bottles? Am I just a big boob because I lack vision? Someone, please, I’m asking for opinions here!

2 thoughts on “The New Vigilantes Are the Ones With Water Bottles

  1. Big Brother always sneaks in under the guise of helping people. I’m afraid the environment will be used in the same manner as welfare/healthcare as an excuse to grow government to even more absurd levels.

    And dude, that urine converter is the best.

  2. Seriously, that urine converter makes me feel like we’re living in Waterworld come to life.

    I keep expecting Kevin Costner to come strolling up to me hoping to barter goods for dirt…

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