Wow, week seven.  Seven weeks o’pregnancy.  It’s funny, because I feel like I’ve already been pregnant forever.  Being constantly nauseous and exhausted can do that to a person.  The nausea is pretty consistent throughout the day, which means that at any given time when you’re talking to me I’m concentrating very hard on not throwing up on your shoes.

The exhaustion is killer too, and certainly not helping.  I feel like I don’t sleep very well at night, so even though we go to bed really early I wake up feeling like I could use another few hours.  I’ve only had one bout of insomnia, which almost destroyed me, so hopefully I’ll keep up my habit of falling asleep the moment my head hits the pillow.

I’m still not showing at all, even though Squishy is now the size of a blueberry.  It’s really hard to not eat the things I’m craving but can’t have (like turkey sandwiches and coffee) when my stomach looks just the same as it always does.  I don’t think I’ve lost any weight so far, or gained any, so we’re continuing this strange life wherein everything is different even though it all looks the same from the outside.

We visited the doctor last week and got to hear Squishy’s heartbeat for the first time.  I was having some cramping and we thought it would be better to check with the doctor.  I couldn’t seem to shake the idea of an ectopic pregnancy and my fallopian tube exploding over the weekend or something.  The doctor had me come in the next day and the ultrasound showed a perfectly healthy, normal pregnancy.  The baby looks like a blurry gummy bear, with little arm and leg nubbins, and we could see his/her little heart just beating away.  I’d show you a picture, but the baby really doesn’t look like anything other than a blur yet.

When the ultrasound tech turned on the sound I thought it was my own heartbeat, but when she told us it was Squishy I was transfixed.  It sounded so loud and strong and alive. It was invigorating.  Wes and I gave each other a high five and floated through the rest of the appointment knowing our little Squishy is developing perfectly.

We still have our official first prenatal appointment on the 14th, and I can’t wait to see Squishy again.  He/she will be twice as large next time!  Even though I’m not really digging the whole first trimester thing, it still makes me squee from my head to my toes to think that all this suffering is for a good cause.  When I imagine Squishy growing and developing, it makes me feel crazed with wonder.  How cool.