Workweek Capers

Things that have happened to me this week:

  • My shoelace caught in the rolly wheels of my office chair at work, thus necessitating a ninja-like move from my chair to the floor, the up-ending of my chair in the middle of the office, and the extricating of said shoelace from the clutches of the wheel whilst my co-workers laughed uproariously and did nothing to help.
  • I ordered a Hot Wheels birthday cake. For a co-worker. Who’s turning 20.
  • I was hung up on by no less than two very evil women. Both of whom owe the company I work for vast sums of money. Cue much gnashing of teeth.
  • I nearly rear-ended a van with a bumper sticker that read, “Don’t hydrogenate me. Ban transfats!” I may have then launched into a rant to Wes about how people should stop creating stupid bans and take their grubby paws off my french fries. If I want to stuff my face with french fries and then do 400 crunches every night to work it off, that’s my business. I’m forthwith creating a ban against stupid bans. I’m going to call it, “The coalition for people who would ask for your help if they wanted it.”
  • I learned that tuna noddle casserole is gross. It’s the first time I haven’t finished my dinner since I was three.
  • I told someone, “Have fun at chemo!” It may go down in the record books as one of the dumbest things I’ve ever said.

All I can say is that it’s a really good thing that Monday is Labor Day. I am officially fried. What’s happened with you this week?

5 thoughts on “Workweek Capers

  1. I would join that coalition. I would join it in a Seattle minute. I would be the VP in charge of hippie beating. And I would rock.

  2. -Wes, I’ll have to consult the other members of the coalition, but I’m pretty sure you’ll be a shoe-in!

  3. At work, I talked to a lady on the phone for 45 minutes about the color of red she wanted her hair to be.

  4. How did you fail to mention that a co-worker willingly climbed into a box for some alone time with her pizza?? The staff then proceded to tape the box closed and then began kicking the box. I HAVE BRUISES!! I feel no pity for you and your poor shoelace!

  5. -Del, how is that even possible? Was she color-blind?

    -Rachelle, How can I possibly blog about something that was awesome yet completely “you had to be there”? I’m sad about your bruide, but may I remind you that a) it was only your best friend who was kicking you and b)I bruised my thumb with a sprocket wrench? Does my pain and humiliation mean nothing to you?!

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